Breaking: DNC Decides Straight White Men Must Wear Blindfolds During Presidential Debates

Presidential candidate Beto O’Rourke was on The View today to try and reboot his campaign. To try and down play his white privilege he told the panel, “I was attempting to say that I felt my calling was in public service — no one is born to be President of the United States of America.” Also, addressing the criticism when mentioning being able to help his wife raise his kids he said, “I deserved it, in a real ham-handed way, I was trying to acknowledge that she has a lion’s share of responsibility during this campaign.”

This kicked the DNC into overdrive. They wanted to come to a solution to equal out the debating stage, so everybody has a fair shake. Thomas Perez, head of the DNC, announced today that all the straight white men will have to wear blind folds if they wish to participate in presidential debates.

When asked how this would create a more fair debate Perez retorted, “Try to make a point or think with your eyes closed when arguing with someone. It has been proven it is a lot harder.”

Perez covered his eyes while talking to reporters and exclaimed, “See! It really does make things more difficult!”

The DNC is doing this to ensure an equal and fair debate among all participants. Perez was even thinking of giving women and minority candidates the ability to use their smart phones for 30 seconds during responses. We will keep you updated if this is allowed.

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Ian Erickson

About Ian Erickson

Ian is New Media Central’s Editor-in-Chief and one half of The Patriarchy Show. He is a married father with three sons and lives in New Jersey. He has worked on several campaigns from national, state and local levels. He has had pieces published in local NJ newspapers such as The Star Ledger. Also, he has contributed to The John Birch Society and various other websites. He had a book of poetry titled Broken published while majoring in Biblical Studies at Pillar College in NJ. He has had his poems published in various poetry journals. He has been a guest speaker at Pillar College to speak about creative writing and poetry. Ian was voted ” Most Sarcastic Person” for the state of New Jersey in 2007.
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Ian Erickson
Ian is New Media Central’s Editor-in-Chief and one half of The Patriarchy Show. He is a married father with three sons and lives in New Jersey. He has worked on several campaigns from national, state and local levels. He has had pieces published in local NJ newspapers such as The Star Ledger. Also, he has contributed to The John Birch Society and various other websites. He had a book of poetry titled Broken published while majoring in Biblical Studies at Pillar College in NJ. He has had his poems published in various poetry journals. He has been a guest speaker at Pillar College to speak about creative writing and poetry. Ian was voted ” Most Sarcastic Person” for the state of New Jersey in 2007.